pucker up

I am a Bad Girl 2003-12-16 3:42 p.m.

I haven't written in forever. Okay where do I begin. I felt terrible for awhile because that guy had screwed me over. I was so upset because I knew I would have to deal with the situation at our work Christmas Party. I had spent so much time and money picking out clothes for me and my friends for it that I didn't really want my night ruin. Me and two other girls were going to sing at the contest and it's the only time we get all dressed up. I had to work that day so I was already stressed about having enough time to get us ready.

We ended up goingot the party late but we had so much fun. WE danced and partied and I went up and sang with not a worry in my head. That guy Mitch didn't even speak to me at first and I didn't even let it phase me. We had so much fun and everyone loved my voice. They were all kinds of impressed and even one of my ex managers told I looked gorgeous. We ended up inviting everyone back to the resort and had an after party. Everyone from all the departments came and employee's and managers partied as one.

To make a long story short for once. I ended up kissing my boss, and alot. I am insane why do I picked the worst situations to put myself in. He's also married and has two kids. I mean he isn't all that much older than me but it's soooo wrong. I was sick all weekend with guilt and come Monday I didn't know what I was going to do. I mean if I had slept with him or something I think I would have packed up and moved far away.

I don't know why I decided to do it but I guess all of the flirting made me want to after awhile. He thinks I am beautiful and tells me. It's nice having someone really wanting you. I guess I needed a little affection after a year. Come Monday I got there before him and when he came into the office he came right into my row to make small talk. He made small talk all day and eye contact with me. At first I couldn't even look at him. It was like he wanted to make sure I am okay. I think I am.

My only problem is that well I want to talk about it. I know that he's not going ot be stupid with me but I am so curious about what he thinks. I don't know what to do again.

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