pucker up

-A Change will do You Good 2002-11-21 9:48 p.m.

Okay so I am doing. Just like that I am moving to Florida. I ended up calling my friend down there and asked her about the apartments down there. I explained how I was fed up with this entire state and was thinking about moving. This was on Friday, well she offered right there that I could stay with her until I find a job and a place. When I was ready she was there for me. I called her on Saturday and told her I was on my way. I bought the ticket on Sunday and gave my two weeks notice on Monday. Now it's Thursday and I have one week to go.

I am so freaking excited I can hardly wait. I can't wait to get my license again. I can't wait to go to school. I can't wait to get away from all of these evil guys here. I can't wait to have no distractions. I hope I can do it. Like I always say I can't be the only person in the world who ever did this. Here in Jersey I just seem to fester in anger. I have no type of solid relationship with anyone. Not my friends, family, or any guys. It's ike I have no hope here. I know that I just might grow up to be a forty year old spinster. My confidence is shot here. I stopped singing, writing, dancing, basically anything that could of better myself. Like right now, I am typing. I swear I can't but I totally know how. I know where the letters are and everything. I am not that fast but you can totally tell it's because I am out of practice. It's like the only thing I can admit to being good at is video games. Why? I don't know and I don't care. All I know is that it has to change and that will be because I want it too.

There my records can be wiped clean and noone knows me. It's not as scary as it is relieving. I can't wait to settle down over there. I can't wait to get there. Everyone is probably so discouraged about it because it is all so sudden. Like I said the one thing I neeeded was time and now I have it. I think my pussy brother knows, I don't want him too, he'd only take credit like the asshole that he is. I didn't tell my father because it's not like he calls me anyways. I really don't think I care much if I never speak to them again. Gross, they are so well I don't know self-centered. Fuck em.

I can't wait to get down there. They said that if I had experience, the job was mine. Reservations or something like that. Basically customer service, so that is good. I'll just get a place and my uncle is going to drive my stuff down in a u-haul. Then I should be set. I hope I hope I hope. Can I just say that my wrist is hurting very badly. I really am so excited, my friends might come with me too.

My friend Michelle is all about it but she just wants to make sure she can pay all of her bills. i just don't know what she was thinking with a 400 dollar car payment. Well maybe it can work out, though that is rent. Once I get down there it'll be easier for them to come. They at least have to visit. I bet I get lonely but then again I do not care at this point.

Wish me luck!

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